je suis venu, j'ai cliqué,
Social system (34 blagues)
Voir aussi :
I am getting so sick of millennials and their attitude.
Always walkin around like they rent the place.
If I had a dollar for every time someone over forty told me my generation sucks…
Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined.
Isn’t it annoying when engineering students call themselves engineers?
It’s stupid. You don’t hear medical students calling themselves doctors or arts students calling themselves baristas.
It’s bread day at the local Moscow bakery and of course there is a long, long line even before the bakery opens.
Finally, it’s time for the bakery to open, but a man wearing a KGB uniform steps out and says: “All Jews in the line should go home, there will be no bread for them.”
A couple of people leave the line.
An hour later, the bakery still hasn’t opened, but the KGB man steps out again and says; “Anyone in the line who isn’t a member of the Communist Party should go home, there will be no bread for them.”
Still more people leave the line.
About noon, the KGB man steps out again, and says; “All people who did not fight in the Great Patriotic War should go home, there will be no bread for them.”
The line is beginning to get quite thin by now.
At 3 pm, the KGB goon steps out again: “Everyone go home, there is no bread today.”
One fellow in the line mutters to another: “Fucking Jews: they always get the privileges!”
🔗Voir la blagueIt snowed last night…
8:00 am: I made a snowman.
8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snow woman.
8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.
8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman’s voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.
8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.
8:22 - The transgender man..women…person asked why I didn’t just make one snow person with detachable parts.
8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.
8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
8:31 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be covered up .
8:40 - The Police arrived saying someone had been offended.
8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.
8:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.
8:45 - TV news crew showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied “Snowballs” and am now called a sexist.
9:00 - I was on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding for me to be arrested.
By noon it all melted
Moral:
There is no moral to this story. It is what this world has become, all because of snowflakes.
Let’s play a game of MILLENNIAL MONOPOLY.
The rules are simple, you start with no money, you can’t afford anything, the board is on fire for some reason and everything is your fault.
My 7 year old nephew showed me with pride the “telephone” he had just made from a string and two tin cans.
I pulled out my iPhone and said, “That’s nice, but look at what kids your age make in China!”
🔗Voir la blagueMy boyfriend keeps talking about overthrowing capitalism in a violent revolution
Could this be a red flag?
Once, societies sent astronauts to space to explore.
Now, billionaires send other billionaires into space to make money.